*Disclainer: This is all fake. Just a fun escape. Don’t take it seriously. The entire internet, www, all your data, all your info, videos, texts, irc, emails are pwned by the xxxx. Social media, banking and finance. They have everything and an AI on you all the time. If you worship a middle eastern god you are my enemy. Any references to words that you have a deep meaning for will also have meaning to me and so will be different. Your words and meanings and the feeling and emotions created for you in your head will be different from mine. This is extraordinarily important to remember. I have lived my entire life as an artist. Everything I have had to do for MOST of the outside world was an act, a gag, a bit, a reference, a poem, a painting, an expression, a thought. Very few people ever see he real person behind the mask and at most it is usually for a short time. Death does not have to mean actual human death and suicide does not have to mean actually taking your life. Yes? Get it? It took 50 years, half a century, for me to break this mind free from the boundings and bindings of myself, family, life, death and the reality that we experienced. I am finally walking alone. I do not see myself or any part of me as in agreement or deeper philos of this reality. This is not a magical mystical thing. It is just the realization that I am alone in my beliefs and self. I am free of labels, capitalism or any economics, free of the psuedo-science of explaining human history from the perspective of the CJI. Free of XX and XY. Free to just be the human that I am, a shell (like the earth) created by processes of separate organisms and the processes of my shell. I am also the mind inside created by the chemical reactions and the environment that it exists in. The name that was given to me at my birth is Watermelon Robot. Like everyone else I did not choose my life ad I did not have any input on the world in which I am forced to live within. I am absolutely against the catastrophic failure of society that has been built. I know that the world has been created by a wealthy class of people that have been in power since the beginning and while new people can make it in it is very rare. These are people that will cause pandemics, plagues, nuclear war/war, bio/chem, famine, natural disasters (allowing them mostly but “creating” in the sense that they will create ecological problems that catalyze the natural problems.) This class of people are all those with ASPD (socio/psych-apathy, narcs) and all lack of empathetic views. These people believe they are better because they will break rules that they make that other people will follow and that means they are superior. I do believe that this has to do with inbreeding that occurred in the past. Knowing they could make autistics and others that will just take life as it is without question. Just believe. The religious, who lack a sense of self, autistics who will follow rules. Though they could not foresee the growth or changes that would occur they still had enough power to keep things going. In the past 3 groups were “created”. People that would be given a story and then bred to live that way. Religions and myths along with drugs were all well known and bad people already knew how to use these things. They knew that they could breed people just like any dog. So it began with the three groups created with religion and drugs. You had one group bred to be business people. Their lives and beliefs and ways of raising kids, living would all be built around the idea of business. Getting money by creating made up industries. They would never have a home and always be outcast. They must be kept small and alone without a home. This drives them to continue to fuck people over and take money any way they can. To supply that business model you need suppliers. These people need to be very uptight and never want to indulge in their supplies (drugs/alc, sex, slaves, goods). No one else measures up so the suppliers do not hae a problem treating others as non-human (slaves). Only select people are allowed in this group as opposed to the business people. No one is allowed in business except the business class. The next would be the consumers. They can be any person that will consume consume consume. Drugs, sex, gambling, food, etc, etc. They can be anything as long as they consume. That was the world a long time ago and it has just morphed into what it is today. Basically it is the same. At different points ex: WW1, WW2 – This represented a change of power. The wars are to kill men off mostly but also women and children. You need a young population that you can FORCE history on to even if some remember it can’t all get passed down. There was a group of people who, during 1000ad on had begun to make up the financial system of Europe after they had sent the plague. They were able to create the financial system, they created racism and slavery, indentured, indebted people. By getting the royalty of Europe to crash and inbreed and cause their own demise they were able to plunder Europe for it’s wealth and they brought with them the families that had been in power in the middle east. Whether it was to get back at the Romans for their occupation or what but they did it. When they had enough money and an idea to build a weapon more powerful than any weapon. They would be able to have their homeland in Europe. People did not like that so they fought. The wealthy were sent to the middle east with some being allowed to stay in Europe. They were also sent to the US. Europe and the US, which was backed by this group in the 1700’s. Europe(E,F,G) – Spain and Italy had been invaded by this group earlier and were not really European in the sense of the north. Where these groups rolled through (Italy, Spain, Germany/Austria, Russia) these places where their ideas took hold experienced a rise in “supremacy”, fascism, and the idea of a ONE group. This all stems from one group from the past. Cosa Nostra and other “Romany”(thieves and criminals that roamed), organized crime. The business group. They were going to take over Europe finally after falling to Europe so long ago. This was an old war that continues today. Power. The stories(the religions) the jews, muslims, christians. It’s a story. They don’t exist. What exists are the groups of evil fucks. Having the money and the ability to make the bomb was not enough. You make to many enemies. That is why the jews suffered the fate they did. They were the ones to invade Europe, create the systems to steal all the money, with the idea of taking over. It was never “the jews”. Poor people who follow no matter their race, religion, sex, or gender or whatever are just pawns. The wealthy jews were sent to israel in the middle east surrounded by their enemies but they got their country with conditions. The scientists were all taken prisoner essentially. All the jews that were trying to make the bomb. Einstein and the like. The reason for the wars was to hide the rel bad guys, the jews, by making them out to be victims. The poor and uneducated were victims to their wealthy. Their wealthy set them up to be the pawns, and did all the bad things to make “the jews” look bad. This was the whole story. A war between ancients. Tiny groups of evil fucks using everyone else to fight their wars. Making everyone believe in stories that they make up. You can’t question jewish history in Europe not because of the poor. The rich known people like royals did not have to be hidden but still wanted power. Along with the others who had stolen power from all of us humans. The royals and business people of America that wanted a piece and Asia that had been decimated at the hands of the jews muslims and christians. Though new people were added we never get to get the real people who were the cause of the wars. All the real shit is hidden under racism, antisemitism all the things you cant question or you are “bad”. Their are plenty of muslim and christians who are wealthy and stay in the public eye. They do not represent the evil behind it. So the 1000 to 1400 kill off everyone and start racism and slavery, 1500-1800 spread out and try to use slaves and might to conquer, 1900 to 1950 try to take over. They will do this again soon because things are getting fucked for them. The reason they, (the jews,muslims,christians) destroyed Africans and then the other native populations were to destroy history. They could then re-write all of what happened before the jews, muslims, and christians. The jews made black people and native americans the bad guys in all the movies. The jews (italians, organized crime, jews) own the media. They were given carte blanche after ww2. Re-write history. The freed slaves and native people were coming up. Oklahoma and other states killed off the blacks and natives to steal the wealth. If the black people and natives of america gained wealth they could also REVEAL history and the fact that it was stolen and re-written. The world that we live in now. Electricity, power(oil/gas), all the capitalist bullshit. That was all taken care of for people in the past and that is why they were better workers and people. Living tribally and communally, everyone is taken care of but in the lone, selfish world of capitalism we are all alone and left to fend for ourselves. A tribe or commune would have no issue with making the power it needed without impacting the entire world. No wires, no cables. Electricity is all around us and we just direct it. By forcing cables and power stations we are enslaved. Add food, medicine, mental health and well being, etc and we are fucked. This world, money, power, greed. This is the evil that we are tricked into at birth. We do not need the system wee it is OMG a pyramid. Gee wonder why they love that, but what it used to mean is that all working together to form one point. It was perverted by the evil folks to mean a One God, One Leader, One Best, One Way. A zero sum game. This is important. A zero sum game does not exist in our lives. To have that means to make something finite that is in a continuum(infinite). Humans exist in a continuum, a spiral that moves forward in time. We do not live in a Cartesian coordinate system of points. A linear life. A point based life. Think of it this way: A day does not begin or end. It just comes around again. A night does not begin or end. Time is not real in a point based system that we use. A second, the unit of time, always exists as a second. It is not a new or old second. It is just a quanta of info explained as a point. But that is silly because as fast as it happens it goes away again. This is all a problem with our perception of the world which has been corrupted by bad information. Think of the sex of a human. We have been corrupt to think in binary. But that is fucking crazy. A human is anything made by a sperm and an egg. So that human could come in any shape or size that it can, obviously some don’t work and they die. They can also be any combination of chromosomes or what-have-you. XX, XY, YY, YX, XXY, YYX, etc. There is no man or woman. Those are points in the possibilities of a human. They are not better or superior. They were chosen by bad people to represent “the best” because they are not very good for the whole. By forcing those outside of the norm into that box they kill themselves or go crazy and get killed or incarcerated etc. The others left are the ones that will comply with the rules. All of this is planned by those in power over thousands of years. They know the best slaves. They know the problems it will cause, they know how easily it is to push “differences”. You make “magic” books like the DSM. If it says you are crazy for liking a man or this or that well then you are fucked. The crazy part is that you have to wonder who he fuck gets to decide who is bad? Because they do a shit job, don’t they? I’m getting away from the main point which is that it is impossible to put humans into points or define them by points. You do that to fuck with and manipulate. To control. This is the world that I was born into. A false world built by evil fucks to stay in power. I despise this place. My whole life has been fighting everyone else who can’t see the things that are apparent in in front of their faces. Idiots, followers, people who crave attention, or need an identity. I fucking hate this place. MY world is seeing earth as one organism. Like the fractal that life is the little critters that live on us we live on the earth. Everything is equal and there is no thing superior or more important than another. Humans, to me, are no more important than a bug is to you. I cannot be racist, sexist, o any of the other made up bullshit that comes from your fucked up religious/social/mental fuckery. I cannot fathom believing the shit that you people believe in. After all this fucking time you never question why all your magic shit hides in the same fucking place. Where is it? Huh you fucking cunts? Not for the past 2000 years not the billions before that has their existed gods or magic. I fucking hate you people for falling for such bullshit. You have never seen it or anything but you kill other poor people for it. I fucking hate you people. I hope that there will be a catastrophic event that kills off humanity. We are the infection. We are the harmful bacteria, the toxin, the venom, the sickness. I do not thin of my self as better or smarter. I know I am not. I know that I have limits. I am sure that because I remain aware and know my better qualities and my worse qualities that I am better for it. I know that by not using blind faith, trust into people I am better off. I have had to learn all of this of course. I felt different as a young person. People around me seem interested in such odd things. I fell for tricks like santa and religion until I was 10. My family life and experiences taught me a huge lesson by that age. I remain a sucker for wanting to be friends with people but for things bigger than that I am not as swayed. I was tricked into the house I am in but I do not think it is a terrible thing. It was a trick because I could not do what I wanted to do and they knew that but sold me anyway. It was not a bad investment as much as a bad investment for me. However, by 10 I realized that America was bullshit: 3rd grade at xxx. Big deal studying the colonies and revolution. A little bit about slavery but they felt we were young and could not delve deep into it. We were told they didn’t know better. They did. I did and I was 10. So, I am all happy and ready because my brother th had gone through it two years earlier. Part of the year is going on a week long? Maybe 3-4 days to Williamsburg. We get to read the part of the declaration of independence “We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal…”. I was psyched until I looked at the workbook and saw thmy J with his slaves. That was the end of America. Everything else has been downhill from there in terms of the lie they sell you on. Religion was bullshit to me just from the stories. I never bought it and was kicked out and quit all the christian shit. My brother :), who I was very fond of, killed himself. This was the end of all magic for me. Religion or any type of though that requires imaginary bullshit. Ghosts, monsters, aliens, and all that kind of thing poof. Vanished. It doesn’t mean I can’t be scared but I do not believe in magic. Rather, I believe in bad people, animals, hurting myself from falling, scary noises cuz I do not know what the fuck they are, the dark. But I know it will not be a monster coming to get me. Just a known thing that fucks me or causes me to fuck myself. Family, loyalty, and trust were gone. My family had failed. I was 10 so I was pretty useless but out of 2 full grown adults (parents), 3 young adults (mmm, ttt, ml), and the young trio (myself, fff and th) we could not save him. We failed him and we failed each other. My best friend who I thought was my friend and his sister raped me and fucked with my head. Jackie was horrible. Fat disgusting white trash whore. Mean and de humanizing. Micah my friend was a manipulative piece of shit. They were both evil. Brother and sister and friends. So by 10 I realized I was completely alone. I had to survive. I was weak. I am autistic, adhd, bipolar, angry. I crave violence but I cannot just hurt people. I need them to attack me first and then I can eat their fucking souls. I will take some verbal attacks, but considering I am 50 and have not fought since teens, it has to be pretty bad. Anything physical gives me license to kill you. I have never killed anyone though. Truth be told I have almost killed a few people: th, he knows, it was with a sword after he punched me dead in the eye for a lollipop. My mother grabbed my legs. I was going to kill him. I was definitely going to kill him. When my mom grabbed me I thought about killing them both but I realized it would make me a slave to them and so I killed them in my mind. I found a way to deal with things without violence. I could kill you off in my head and mourn you the same way as if you died. The person after was not the same and never would be, they were my enemy. For both my mom and th I have tried over the years but they have been dead to me for a long time. My moms craziness from 5-18 was a dill burger. th, had forsaken me to rapists in Montgomery village, he had smashed my finger with a brick, knocked me on to my head on to concrete giving me a bad concussion. He was hated at my high school. He was filth in college. I despise th. He has done so many disgusting things but gets away with everything. Always keeps above me in the family because he follows the rules even though he has been a vile piece of shit compared to me. fff, when he spat on me when I was 15 or so. But he had died to me before that as well. I did become friends with him but we fell apart. He kept his issues and never dealt with them at all. We have never talked about the past. I do remain with feelings that fff can be decent but he needs to fix himself. When I got to know how foul mmm was it was over. Pretty much during middle school. I realized he was mortally bankrupt. He did not really exist. He was a ghost of a man. I did not need to kill him off he had done it himself. ttt, taught me he was shit when I was 19. It was how he treated me after I had a breakdown. Then watching him with his wife and son. Then watching him and his career and views. The way he kills himself with a sport but it is acceptable LOL. ml is the most manipulative. She is the most evil because she tries to disguise it. She destroyed cl and coach. She let :) die and she let dad die along with ttt and mmm, but that was dads decision. I loathe that filthy whore. With all my family, up to my fathers death, I tried and kept at it but that was the game. They never had my best intentions. When I saw mmm, ttt, and ml at the reading it was the first time I saw their real faces. Well, the whole real face. I hate that I have to point this out but I know people reading this will use my words and phrasing against me. By saying anything like “their real faces” or “whole real face”, I am in no way implying devils or spirits. I mean that for me, when I look at you, I can be deceived by what I feel for you and it isn’t until you are shitty that I see your face turn ugly. It is the same face it just gets flopped in my brain, literally. The real meaning of the word. Look at someone who is a psychopath or going through severe mental illness, drunkenness. They look different. OK, back to the topic. When I saw the three and how they acted it was when I understood what happened to :) and why. It was why they had behaved the way they did during the end of my fathers life. They knew and had been waiting for money. I can honestly say that I never knew how much money my dad had. I though it may be in the hundreds of thousands. They tried to corner me at his condo until they realized I would not back down. They knew they could not control me anymore. That I knew who they were and it would never go away. I could never be fooled again. My dad had bought my freedom but only from my family. The money made me realize that I was a slave for no reason. I had stayed around my family because it was family. They had stayed because of the money they could get from my mom and dad. I do not believe that fff and th were the same. It was the first three children that were pissed about sharing with the rest. Very disgusting. What I found interesting was that even with money you cannot get shit done. Finding good workers is impossible. Finding people who want to help rather than just make money. I do not belong in this world. I knew that when I first tried to kill myself. I just had a thought right this moment. A new one. I must have killed myself off first in my brain in order to live the way I did. I kno now to never do that again. It is freedom or death. No other options. Dying free is always a good death. ALWAYS better than dying a slave. That leaves my daughter. She chose her mom and decided when she left for NC, I guess before that, that she and her mom would fuck me over for my money and roll. She and her mom even said that to me LOL. “We want the money and then you eed to leave our lives.” Poor kid was manipulated. It was her life not her moms. That was her mistake there. I never had any intentions of not paying for her school. She, ml, her mom, and my mom were plotting behind my back. I know this because I always feed info in a certain way to certain people. Since they are too stupid too realize it they latch on to key words so I know who said what and to whome. I had to learn that when dealing with ml, my mom, and later on ppp. I hated her mom since I met her. I was a drunken idiot that got a manipulative whore pregnant because she tricked me. Fuc me I guess. I didn’t trust her and she constantly lied to me about everything. She got pregnant 3 times in a row. I was 2, and the current is 3. The first was poor. She kept me but I was able to ditch her and then she hooked the next guy in exactly the same way as me and the other guy. She was a pure narc. Dead eyes, no thoughts, only instincts and always about herself first. I knew ppp and I would have issues but I thought it would be like my father and me not that she would think I was trying to hurt her. I knew ppp was dying when she started to say things after moving to NC. She was lying to me about her mom and money. She lied to me about buying a house. She started trying to ask for crazy shit. The real sign was when she said that I brought her to New York to trick her into getting on a helicopter. I cannot tell you how this destroyed me, my world. The only thing I had at that point was the hope my daughter and I were in a bad place. Those trips were sacred to me. No less sacred than your gods and magic are to you. I held those trips in a special place and she shattered that with bullshit. She had been lied to and manipulated to think that because I never did that to her. She had a fat friend that got everything that she wanted. She went to see the Lion King musical in NYC which was brand new so it was impossible to get tickets. ppp still in middle school wanted to go and see it because the fat rich friend would stick it in her face and she knew she came from money but we did not just give it away. So I told ppp that we would probably not get tickets to the biggest show in NYC the next day. I mean what the fuck. I really thought she was smart enough to understand that but she isn’t she is like her mom. So we went to NYC got a room woke up and went first thing to the line and of course it was huge and already sold out. We could not go and I had made that clear a million times but she is like her mom and thought I was just mean. So we had the money and I said since we cant go to the show lets do the copter. That was it but she, her mom, her nana, ml, and my mom had convinced her that I had just fucked her over. It does not matter that she was a kid. I knew my mom was lying about my dad and figured out she was the monster and not him. ppp should have had a better brain. It was downhill. Then I had told my sister something about school to see if ppp was talking behind my back with ml and she was. She ml and her mom plotted to take my money. Fuck me over. So I took back control and said fuck you. She died to me when I was in the hospital and she took my call and did not tell me her feelings. I thought I was going to die. I was in the hospital a month and had 3 surgeries. I will bet you any amount of money...My mom, my sister, and her mom convinced ppp that nothing was wrong with me and I was faking it. I was not realy that bad and nothing was wrong. It would be impossible for them to know anything as I specifically did not allow my docs to provide information. So, either ml or my mom who were the only two people I talked to had to have said that I was not really bad and was going to be fine. It was “just my appendix”. This would be coming from my mother who is a fucking psycho that thought the feds planted a bug in her and as a person with mental illness I know she still believes it just hides it so she doesn’t go back in LOL. Then ml. A whore that never worked in her life. She fucked over me, :), my dad, ccc(her sons dad), chc and cl. That is only the close ones that she really fucked over. That woman is fucking aeful and I would love to crush her skull. Neither of those narcissistic cunts know anything about science, medicine, or reality. If one of the whores in the family get sick one day and goes to the doctor it is an event. I was in hospital a month not because like mmm I hurt myself or drugs, not like ttt because he hurts himself, not like ml and alcohol, my mom and her never taking care of herself, not like any of that but because of a fucking actual illness. To them it was nothing. To me I was dying alone in a shitty white trash hospital in Frederick Maryland. February 22 2024 I forgot where I stopped so I am starting a new thought because it’s my note. I know that tech et al have taken our lives and just added complexity but no substance. The 90’s showed the je...tech that people were going to be able to work less and start their own thing so that had to be put to a stop. Basically, where getting from point A to point B was a few steps. So we made computers to help with the repetitive tasks. --Everything hurts today. My back and the nerve (sciatica), it fucks up my leg. I think my lower back is going to have a bad issue. My feet hurt like crazy. The big to bones hurt bad. The left toe is having nerve pain. I am probably going to have to get it chopped at some point. My left wrist is hurting bad too.-- We got good and things were going to fast. So they added more things between A→B. It’s not further, it’s added bullshit that has no value. It’s a time suck. Everything is this way now. The fractal. The cutting 0 → 1 (.5)…. Fuck me. I was trying to make a gif. Drew a picture on my phone. The fucking app requires payment, and an account. It won’t export jpg/png, February 23 2024 In my dreams I am in fruiting with the mycelia. My observations have been this: 1. For inoculation the substrate/grain/agar/LC should be kept warm 75-80 (77) a. Complete darkness is best b. Medium such as grain or AIO should be kept compact with some air but mostly kept squished together makes the colonization start faster. c. As the colonization begins to happen you can watch to see if breaking it a little for air, shaking, tapping. These should all be things that would e happening. Some churning, compacting, air. I feel that the mycelium like the attention. It allows you to watch for issues early on. Moving moisture and air. It should be thought of as a “helping hand”. You are not forcing and pushing. You can see where it is growing and how and just act as a catalyst. Moving it around a little. d. It starts patchy and this is when you can assist it. Once the myc. Is taking hold more than little patches you have to stop messing with it and let it do it’s thing. Do a big shake at 20-30%. Then don’t touch it. Wait until fruiting. I hate that the government, google and everyone obfusates all the informatin. If you look anything up it is a mess of misinfo. Temp ranges, procedures, everything. They always have the same approach. Saturation, misinformation, destruction.s February 24th 2024 The Business man, the Supplier, and the Consumer. The top of this pyramid is what rules. The eye. Google, Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, IRS, NSA, CIA, DIA, et al. These and others are the eye. They are a group. The botth of the pyramid is the consumer. This represents the person that can be anyone. You can rich or poor smart or stupid educated or ignorant. As long as you are hungry and will eat anything in front of you and everything around you and to eat before anyone. The middle is the person that will do anything to sell or supply. Someone who will take anything and sell it for their own. They will make it ‘theirs’ in a way. The energy you as the consumer put into a song, for example, never goes to you it goes to them and they give you a tine piece. March 5 2024 The house is not going to the traders. I thought I had impressed upon them the importance of respect, ethics, boundaries, and BALANCE/EQUALITY/SAMENESS/HUMANITY. I thought they understood that the gold is more important to me than anything. I felt incredibly disrespected by the young man. Him calling me “bibi” (”bebe”) did not sit well with me and I knew it was more of a put down or insult. It is to establish a [You are less than] relationship. Fuck that and fuck him. I gave him 47.7g of gold at @ 2,000 (2k+) $64.3 pr/g = 3067.11 Prior business: $20pr/g trader = $954.00 $43.3 Donn = $2113.00 The Thief stole from Donn: $1431.00 Donn 46% $1636.00 Thief 54% $34.00 pr/gram The traders believe I am a christian. They think I am their slave. That is too bad because I thought they wanted to do business and they understood balance and equality. I thought they understood I was the ghost of an Irishman. They did not! A thousand years ago I would have taken his hand. Fifteen hundred years ago I would have taken his head. Two thousand years ago I would have taken his entire village This would not be a good business opportunity. I want balance. March 20 2024 Harvest was good. PE’s are rockin’. I celebrate my property tax being paid. The fucking bastards at Fredneck make me pay 3K x 2 for this shit land. I should be able to sue at least for my money back. All flood plain and can’t do shit with it. So I commune with the shroom. I stand firm for my soil. Lick a rock on foil. Seduce me seduce me dress me up in stussy. Hell is round the corner where I shelter. Isms and schisms. 03/31/2024 March has been a rough month. I have been off meds for a while now and I know I have to re-adjust. My bipolar is tearing at me. It is different now. It seems less wanting to kill me. I don’t crave alcohol. I tried a drink and I just couldn’t. Luckily the alcohol problem seems to be at bay so I won’t worry about it. That would be one of the biggest problems I would face. If I drink I will lose the little freedom I have. My body is falling apart. I have spent march trying to rebuild what I can but my tendons and ligaments are just wanting to snap. My feet are really fucked. The broken bones just are not healing. It hurts a lot to walk. My lower back is bad. I have improved my diet. I have been waling and exercising but I have to go really light. My mind goes fast up and down. It slams around like Demi fetching a ball. Just awkward and unnecessary banging around. I miss friendship. I feel lonely. I need to leave Frederick. This is just not the place for me. I really hate it here. 04/03/2024 I feel the overwhelming pressure today. It feels like too much...but it always does and I continue anyway. I am an un enslavable slave. I am a paradox. Whereby the master sets up a system of slavery that encompasses all of their lives. Mind and body. But because the system is a monolith it fails. When you continue to try to add parts to control. They begin to overlap. They cross and crisscross. They don’t run parallel they overlap completely. It ruins the illusion and just makes it too much to bear. Because of the way my mind works I cannot be enslaved by anything. So instead they rely on this over taking ME, the I, the self. Then suicide. But I just do not want to kill myself. I really don’t care about it, or dying, but I cannot kill myself because it would gie into the slavery. So I am at a loss. Spinning and spinning until I die. Just a crazy old man. No friends, no family. No groups. I just want to live my life and stay away from people that associate themselves with any group. To do so is slavery of the self. “I AM X”. The X part is what makes you a slave. No one can put a human into any group. No human has any control, directly or indirectly, over another. But here I am. I am a paradox. I will always be free in my head. I would just like the rest of me to enjoy that freedom for a while.